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Relighting the Fire

12/8/2014

 
Amy...help! I have recently re-connected with an ex. He has recently split from a relationship (4 months ago). How can I jump start this "friendship"...how can I get him to email or telephone more? When he emails it will be a single sentence...we have had one really long phone call but nothing since (over a week ago).....don't know what to do. Should I give up?

Dear Relighting,

      I keep hearing that song “You Can’t Hurry Love” going through my head as I think about how to answer you. So, I think that’s the case. You’re going to have to be patient and see what happens. You can always ask him to hang out, have dinner, see a movie. Or you can call and email him more. But you need to pay close attention to his reactions and try to give him space as you move forward. His delays in response may be a hesitation to get involved again after his last breakup or it could simply be that he’s looking for friendship rather than romantic involvement. Only time will tell.
     Now, that said, I wonder a few things. Why did you break up in the first place? Is this someone you really want to reconnect with? Since I don’t really know how your relationship was before, I hate to make any assumptions, but I am curious why you would want to reconnect romantically with your ex. Are you interested in being friends? Or are you mostly looking to get back together? These are some things to consider as you move forward. 

Bottom line, give it time.

Amy

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