Reappearance of the Dreaded Ex

Dear Amy,
My boyfriend has not been with his wife for 19 years. I found out he wired her 100 dollars in November. Should I say anything to him about this? I also found two pictures of her on his phone. We both had seen a picture of her at a friends home. Her hair was cut very short so the conversation was about her. He said she texted him the photos so he could tell her it was not to short. They do not live in the same state. Should I care?

Dear Dreading (at least a little bit),

     It sounds like you already do care a little. The real question is whether you should do anything about it and my general feeling is no. Do you and your boyfriend have a good relationship? If so, I’d say to be aware of your feelings, acknowledge them and then let it go.  Do you share finances? (shared bank account for instance). If you do, then it would be ok to ask him about the wired money simply because then it also effects you. If not, then forget about it. Here’s the thing…people carry around a lot of baggage and it’s not unusual for ex’s to pop up here and there. It’s not a problem until it’s a problem.
     So unless there’s some bigger issue here, I’d just focus on your relationship with your boyfriend. From what you’ve said, it doesn’t sound like the ex poses much of a threat and unless there’s more to the story, I would just brush it off and move forward.

Amy