No Good Deed...
I recently opened up a college saving's account for our 2 year old son and emailed all three sets (yes, divorce) of grandparents his college savings account info and let them know that if they ever wanted to give to his 529 account in lieu of a birthday or Christmas gift to feel free. They could even claim it on their taxes!
I put no pressure to do so, just let them know. My in-laws pulled my husband aside and let him know how rude they thought my email was.
I didn't think it was rude. My mom has since given 529 money instead of gifts and thinks it's a great idea.
Do you think it was rude?
Dear Fantastic Mother!
NO, I unequivocally DO NOT think it was rude :)
I’m sorry that happened to you. In this day and age, saving for college is the mark of responsible parenting and it’s a shame that your in-laws took offense. That being said, I’d suggest two things. 1) Either you or your husband let them know that you did not intend to offend them, but that your child’s education is important to you and you wanted to give them another option for meaningful giving. And 2) own your decision and your communication. You can’t always keep people from taking offense at the things you do and say, but in this case, I don’t believe you’ve done anything wrong. Bravo to you and your husband for being proactive about your children’s education. Give your in-laws lots of love and it’ll blow over before you know.
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Don't be shy! Say what's on your mind and get a good dose of perspective in return.