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Gaining Confidence

1/2/2015

 
Dear Amy,
I am 12 years old and I am having problems right now. There is this guy at school that I've liked for 2 years and I want to talk to him but I am really shy around boys mostly the popular guys. Please help me.


Dear Confidence,

     Finding the confidence to talk with people we like is a skill that you’ll be developing forever. Even as adults, we sometimes find it scary and uncomfortable to talk to the people we are interested in. We get nervous because we want them to like us back. And we’re not sure what they’re going to say.
     So, my best advice to you comes in two parts: 1) think about all the things that are wonderful about you…the things you like about yourself. Remember that there’s no one else in the world like you. And then, no matter what happens, no matter how someone makes you feel, think about those things. Loving yourself makes you confident, and confidence is one thing you’ll need to get past feeling shy. 2) be yourself. Once you’ve figured out all the things that make you special, don’t try to hide those things by acting differently around this boy, even if he makes you nervous. If he doesn’t like you just the way you are, he’s missing out.
     Be brave. Talk to him. Start with hello. Be friends. The best relationships start by finding things that you have in common and sharing those things. And no matter what, believe in yourself. The more you like yourself, the more others will like you.

(P.S. to everyone else reading this, this goes for you too! I think sometimes we forget).

Amy

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